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My name is Sean Connelly, and I've gone by the pseudo-name Peebrain while on PsiPog.net. This blog was a running stream of my thoughts, beliefs, and experiences about PsiPog and psychic abilities in general.

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Monday, May 29, 2006

Alrighty, here's the conflict:

There are two models for reality, both which make sense in their own ways. Somehow, I believe both are true, but I'm not sure how that's possible . (1) Reality is inherently subjective, and (2) Reality is inherently objective.

By nature of the claims, they are impossible to test. This leads me to suspect they are the same claim, even though they sound contradictory. So what exactly are these claims, and how do they relate to psionics?

(1) Reality is inherently subjective. This means that it's impossible for you to experience an objective reality, because it doesn't exist. When you look at something "outside" of yourself, you are still looking at a creation of yourself. Basically, you're living in a dream world, where the dream characters try to convince you that the dream world you create is objective (when it really isn't).

(2) Reality is inherently objective. This is the "normal" belief. This model says that there is a reality outside of your mind, and that you can experience this objective reality, and try to figure it out. For example, I believe that plants function outside of my mind, so if I want to learn about plants, I can go up to a plant and poke around inside of it with some scientific tools.

The problem is that both models have evidence. And any evidence you can find for one model, can be re-interpreted through the other model. For example, let's say you are walking down the street, and you find $5 on the ground. In the objective model, that $5 existed outside of yourself, and through some form of coincidence or synchronicity, you came about discovering this $5 on the ground. Sounds normal.

Or, in the subjective reality, you created the $5. Your beliefs about reality allowed for the $5 to exist, and you created this bill based on the rules you have for your reality.

But now you can argue: ok, so reality is subjective. But isn't that statement itself an objective truth about reality, then? If reality was truly subjective, then it would only be subjective when your rules about reality defined it as subjective. Is that confusing? Let's try again: the subjective reality model states that there aren't any fundamental truths - all fundamental truths are beliefs in your reality. However, isn't the statement "there aren't any fundamental truths" then considered a fundamental truth?!

It seems like a loop. It all comes down to answering the question: what are fundamental truths? Do they exist outside of your control, in a reality that you are playing a part in? Or do you create these fundamental truths, and therefore, create your entire experience in your fabricated dream reality? And if you are creating these fundamental truths, wouldn't it be fundamentally true that you create them?

Lots of logical philisophical enigmas.

I think the conflict exists in defining who "you" are. This is how both models can be true at the same time. Here's my conclusion on this conflict (which I've come to realize while writing this post):



I think we can all agree that when we keep zooming in on reality, eventually we get to cells, then molecules, then atoms, then some quantum field of some sort... but eventually everything is made of the same stuff (or maybe you disagree?). Let's call this stuff "energy". Sounds good so far.

So, we are all connected. We are all made of the same stuff, and division is just an illusion. I'm energy, made of energy, in a field of energy, surrounded by other energy-things, all connected and functioning as one. You can't have something that exists outside of this, by nature of it's definition. We have defined "energy" (in this context) to mean the stuff everything is made from. The minute you say, "well wait a second, THIS isn't made of energy!", I will say, "of course it is, because it exists, and by definition it's made of energy".

Next comes the question: what/who are YOU? Well, the most obvious answer for myself, is that I'm Sean Martin Connelly, and right now I'm sitting in front of my computer, typing away at this long post. But also, by definition, I'm energy that is interconnected to everything else.

If you define yourself as energy, then you are forced to believe in the subjective reality model. Because there is nothing outside of energy... just as there is nothing outside of the subjective model of reality. Everything is subjective, experiencing itself.

If you define yourself as a portion of the energy, (i.e., "I am Sean Martin Connelly"), then you are forced to believe in the objective reality model. There is you, then there are things outside of you. So, both are true! I am energy that is interconnected with everything else. And I'm also Sean Martin Connelly.

In conclusion, the question of "Is the subjective reality model correct? Or is the objective model correct?" is the same question as, "Am I energy in a sea of energy? Or am I an individual?" Rephrased like that, it seems obvious.

So the answer is: both. Reality is 100% subjective, and 100% objective. It's the same thing.

~Sean

Monday, May 29, 2006, 12:04 PM — 2 comments

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Hurray!

I had an OBE this morning. It's really weird how it happens sometimes. A lot of times when I try to have OBEs, I experience synchronicities that help me. This morning, for example, a friend knocked on my door at 6:30am to ask for a shirt. It woke me up at the perfect time, and after giving him a shirt, I decided it would be perfect to try an OBE. I stayed awake for about 5 minutes, checked my e-mail, went to the bathroom, and got a drink of water. Then I went back to bed to meditate.

I did terrible during my meditation, and my mind was constantly wandering. I knew that I wouldn't have an OBE at that rate. So I hit a semi-deep state, and started talking to my subconscious. I sent a strong intent, "Can you please help me have an OBE? I honestly really do want some help. I don't think I can do it on my own this time, and I really want to have one, and I won't freak out if you help me."

Of course I got a reply, "Sure, I can help, no problem", and I replied "Thanks!". But a lot of times when I talk to my subconscious, I'm very skeptical, and a part of me thought, "Sure, he says he'll help, but I'm just psychotic and talking to myself. No one will help." I tried to maintain my meditative state, but my mind wandered way too much, and eventually I passed out.

Surprisingly, I got yanked out. My first memory is literally feeling yanked out and positioned above my bed very quickly. I was a little shocked, but I thought, "OBE! Hell yeah!" and went with it. Then I zipped back to the same orientation as my physical body.

And then, an amazing thing happened. Two pairs of hands grabbed my ankles and wrists. The hands pulled me up and out, towards the center of my room. I was a little shocked by it, but more curious. So I purposely went back to my body, and the hands came back (only this time one pair on my ankles, not my wrists), and pulled me back to the center of the room. While they were pulling me, I reached down and grabbed the hand on my left ankle, and felt it. I shook the hand, and tried to send out a "Whoa cool, thanks!" type of hand shake, however that would feel .

After that, I was teleported to my old backyard in upstate New York (I live in Maryland right now). I was freely flying through the air, and it was amazing. I didn't really control where I was flying, it was very automatic and smooth though. I flew into my old neighbors yard, and flew past them and far into the sky.

While flying into the sky, I was intent on focusing on the detail of the experience, because I was waiting for it to switch into a dream. I knew it was going to happen at some point - usually I don't detect it, and believe I am still out of body. This time I was very intent on figuring out when the switch occurred. While flying into the sky, the detail level dropped, and information started to become garbled. I figured that was the point where I had entered a dream.

At some point, I'm not sure when, I was also in my neighbors back yard petting a huge bird. It was like a huge pelican, and I was petting it's neck. I don't remember if that was before or after the dream-switch.

After it switched into a dream, then it really did turn crazy. I had a false awakening of grabbing my recorder, and recording myself. Then I went into some dream where I was walking down a hallway, and some other weird things. I don't really remember.

Either way, I'm really excited about getting a "helping hand" on getting out! I can't believe when I talk to my subconscious, that it is actually accomplishing something . A lot of times it feels like I'm just talking to myself and getting nothing done - I now know that something is really going on. On top of that, this is my third experience where something else helped me (first was when they talked to me, second was when they pushed my back). I'm glad I'm no longer alone in my adventures, and that I've overcome my fear and limited beliefs enough to experience some help.

~Sean

Thursday, May 25, 2006, 10:50 AM — 2 comments

Monday, May 22, 2006

Both NI and SheepKing posted some new posts on their blogs. You can check out their links from my "Favorite Blogs" list on the right.

These past couple days I've just been thinking. Steve Pavlina's subjective reality idea is hard to swallow... I understand the concept, but putting it into action is really difficult. Perhaps I'll stick with objective reality beliefs for a while. The only benefit I noticed from it is it removes all fear. That's it.

I've also been thinking about memory, and the physical senses. Memory plays such a huge role in defining my current experience in this reality... it's strange that we don't know more about it. I wonder if remembering something is using the same mechanism as RV... I'm sure it's all tied together somehow. With RV, we're just remembering something that we haven't experienced directly. Just a thought.

The physical senses, especially hearing, have intrigued me as well. I can hear things, and I can hear people talk, but I'm trying to figure out how I actually comprehend the information that's being said. How can my mind convert vibrations in the air into an idea in my head that I comprehend? That conversion process is very peculiar.

I haven't had an OBE in a long time. I hope I have one soon... I'll have to start practicing a little harder.

~Sean

Monday, May 22, 2006, 12:51 PM — 3 comments

Monday, May 15, 2006

In the previous post, Mr. Shields left a comment to inform me that Steve Pavlina linked to PsiPog.net in one of his blogs. This started a chain reaction. First, I went to the site, and read the blog (duh). Then I became excited, because Steve is going to address his ideas on psychic development in the future, and he's a smart guy who will get me thinking. Then a few more things happened that I don't remember, but eventually I came upon his Podcasts. I've listened to some in the past, but he had added a few since my last visit.

So I decided to listen to a few more. Eventually I got down to #013, on Beyond Religion. I knew Steve would have some cool ideas, but I wasn't really expecting anything mind blowing.

I'm not sure if the content of the podcast was actually mind blowing, or just that it was something I needed to hear at that specific moment... but Steve presents an awesome idea, that I've kind of run with. The idea is that we can hold conflicting beliefs in our mind with no problems at all. He uses the analogy of a computer... just like a computer can run different software (Word processor, Spreadsheet, Game, etc), we can run different beliefs in our consciousness.

As a result, we can be Christian, Athiest, Buddhist, Agnostic, and New Age at the same time. I visualize a computer screen... I maximize the Athiest screen when I want to be Athiest... then I can minimize it, and pull up the Christian program, when I want to feel Christian. I can have both pieces of "software" on my "computer", and it doesn't matter if they are in conflict with each other.

This plugs into a crazy story I read in Tony Robbins' book, Awaken the Giant Within (p. 76).

Beliefs are not limited to impacting our emotions or actions. They can literally change our bodies in a matter of moments. I had the pleasure of interviewing Yale professor and best-selling author Dr. Bernie Siegel. As we began to speak about the power of beleif, Bernie shared with me some of the research he'd done on people with Multiple Personality Disorders. Incredibly, the potency of these people's beliefs that they had become a different person resulted in an unquestioned command to their nervous system to make measurable changes in their biochemistry. The results? Their bodies would literally transform before the researchers' eyes and begin to reflect a new identity at a moment's notice. Studies document such remarkable occurrences as patients' eye color actually changing as their personality changes, or physical marks disppearing and reappearing! Even diseases such as diabettes or high blood pressure come and go depending on the person's belief as to which personality they're manifesting.


Can we tap into this same power without having to go crazy? Yes!

So how does this apply to psionics?

Not_Important (NI) and myself have talked a lot about beliefs with each other in the past. See, the problem is that whatever we believe really alters our entire reality. So we come up with some solutions to that problem, so that we can accomplish what we want. One of my solutions is to convince yourself that whatever you want to accomplish actually isn't in conflict with your beliefs. I.e., you leave all your beliefs the same, you just relabel your goals so that they are in alignment with your beliefs. This works. NI's solution, in response, is to alter your beliefs so that they are insanely flexible. I.e., change your beliefs so that they can adapt when needed. This works too.

Steve's solution, as outlined in his Beyond Religion podcast, is to change your meta-beliefs - i.e., change your beliefs about beliefs. Specifically, Steve targets the meta-belief that "I can only believe in things that aren't in conflict with each other", or worded differently, "All my beliefs must be in agreement with each other". NI and myself have been working on ways to navigate one system of limiting belief. Steve shows that we can also install multiple belief systems, so that if we want to bypass a limiting belief in one system, we just switch systems!

This releases a lot of tension. Instead of constantly trying to figure everything out, and create one master belief system, I can just let my beliefs relax. I can be a hardcore skeptic that thinks psychic abilities are silly. But when I'm in a situation where that belief system no longer serves me (for example, when I'm trying to do something psychic), I can minimize that belief, and pull up the PsiPog belief system. Or a New Age belief system. Or even a Wiccan belief system, if I feel that would be a better decision. I consciously choose what system to work in, based on the pro's and con's of that system.

Does this work!? Yes! After I listened to Steve's podcast, I layed down in bed to just think about it. I'm going to get a little religious here, so be prepared. I'm someone who has a lot of conflict with the Christian belief system. I know a lot about it, but constantly argue with it, and fight against it. With Steve's idea thumping through my head, I came to the conclusion: if I can hold multiple belief systems, then I can install the Christian belief system that I already know a lot about, and even though a lot of my normal beliefs are in conflict with it, I should still be able to feel Christian when I choose to. If I don't want to be Christian, I should be able to just minimize that program, and pull up another one.

So I tested it out. I minimized all my negative beliefs about Christianity, and asked for Jesus to come into my heart (sounds crazy now that I'm typing it ). Low and behold, my body went through a change. I could feel my heart pulsating, and I couldn't stop smiling. After laying in bed smiling for a few minutes, I decided to minimize the belief system. So I minimized my entire Christian experience, and pulled up my old belief system. I felt normal, and even a little silly that I had experienced that! Then I minimized that belief system, and pulled up my Zen Buddhist belief system. I didn't feel silly, but I felt more wise for figuring this out (with Steve's help). I minimized that belief system, then brought up Christianity again... and I could feel the pulsation in my heart again.

I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to explain this to my Dad. I have been saved, under the Christian belief system. When I pull up that belief system, I become happy that I'm saved, and am excited that I'll see my Dad in heaven. When I minimize the belief system, and pull up a New Age belief system, I go back to the thought that heaven is silly, and I can't wait to see my Dad out-of-body to show him that I was right all along about life after death. But then I can just minimize that, and pull up the Athiest belief system, and I immediately think this is all so stupid!

Logically, the systems are in conflict with each other. But who says we can't hold conflicting beliefs? Why are we forced to feel stressed out when we are in conflict? Why must we choose ONE BELIEF RIGHT NOW that defines us? Why not have multiple systems installed on our consciousness harddrive that we can pull up whenever we choose to?

How does this apply to psionics. Easy. Instead of trying to figure out one master belief system where everything under the sun is possible, we can simplify the problem. All we need are seperate belief systems that work for each skill. If I want to do PK, I pull up the PK belief system, and have no problems. Who cares if my experiences with PK are in conflict with my energy manipulation (EM) belief system. When I want to be skeptical, I pull up that belief system. The skeptical belief system can be deadly to PK results... but it's useful for challenging crazy thoughts. If I want to challenge some crazy thoughts, I pull up the skeptic belief system. If I want to stop caring about that, and just do some PK for fun, I minimize it... and pull up the PK belief system.

This all happened last night, and I'm really excited to get some results with this. I already tried bending a spoon, and I'm not sure if my eyes were playing tricks on me, but it did look like I was getting results. Once I get some tangible results, I will most definitly be able to finish my next eBook on this same subject. I can't wait!

~Sean

Monday, May 15, 2006, 10:33 AM — 8 comments

Sunday, May 07, 2006

I started reading a new book on OBEs, titled Out-of-Body Exploring : A Beginner's Approach, by Preston Dennett.

It's pretty interesting! It could be considered a second- or third-generation book on OBEs, because Dennett takes a lot of quotes from Monroe, Peterson, and Bruce's previous books. He gets ideas from the "old classics", and then applies these ideas to his practice, to see what results he gets. It's cool to read about.

It's nice to see another person actually trying what other authors have suggested - and reporting on how well it worked, or what happened. For example, Dennett read that if you call your name out while out of body, that weird things will happen. So he tried it out. In a lot of cases, he tried calling his name out, but nothing happened at all. On one occasion, some crazy stuff did happen. Here's a quote:

Time to experiment! I remember that something amazing is supposed to happen if you say your name while out of body. I say out loud, "My name is Preston Dennett."

There's a shift. Suddenly, I'm outside in a field in the country. It's nighttime and the sky is filled with stars. I examine the night sky and am shocked to see the most dramatic astronomical display I've ever seen. Huge fireballs are crisscrossing the night sky. It's a fantastic meteor shower. The effect is incredible, and I am totally awestruck.

I fly upwards and into the sky. I keep going up until suddenly there's a shift and I'm in another dimension. I'm surrounded by millions of tiny, shiny, golden flakes. It's like being inside a ball filled with gold glitter. It is indecribably beautiful. I feel absolutely fantastic.

There's a shift and I end up in another place, which I can't quite remember. (Marth 19, 1997)


The only downside of the book is that it's not organized very well. It's basically just a list of random experiments he tried, and the journal entries of the results. Dennett tries to break them into logical sections, but it doesn't really work. (For example, Chapter 3 is "Experiments on the Astral Plane", and Chapter 4 is "Further Astral Experiments"). Overall, the information is useful, and it's worth the read for those searching for consistency between OBE researchers.

~Sean

Sunday, May 07, 2006, 2:37 PM — 2 comments

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Background info: Focus 15 is a state of consciousness labelled by the Monroe Institute. Robert Monroe was a pioneer in OBEs, and he developed The Gateway Experience (TGE) to help teach others how to achieve weird states of mind, including OBEs. I've been training with TGE for a while now...

So I've been getting a little impatient. I decided to skip over a couple CDs, and just dive right into Focus 15. A few weeks ago I wrote about my new success with Focus 12, that I was happy about. My new experience with Focus 15 is... nothing. The track really assumes you can put yourself into Focus 10 and 12 very quickly (which I sure as hell can't blah). So I had to restart the track a few times to allow myself the time to get into Focus 12 correctly... but I still didn't have luck with Focus 15. I suppose I can't expect that much my first try, especially since I skipped over a lot of the training in between. Oh well, just thought I'd update people on my impatientness.

~Sean

Thursday, May 04, 2006, 6:14 PM — 1 comments